Monday, April 19, 2010

My top Texts From Last Night of the week

(256): I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
http://tfl.nu/8aru
(610): I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
http://tfl.nu/1pbs
(214): A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
http://tfl.nu/a1lj
(517): My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
http://tfl.nu/a468
(530): my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
http://tfl.nu/yh1f

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