Thursday, February 24, 2011

Jane Corwin needs to actually read the Constitution

Jane Corwin, the recently-designated Republican candidate to succeed disgraced Rep. Chris Lee (R-26) from western NY, issued a statement criticizing the Obama administration's decision about the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). Attorney-General Holder issued a memo saying that part of DOMA is unconstitutional, and that his office would no longer defend against lawsuits that challenge that section.

Corwin said
“The President of the United States swore an oath to uphold the laws of our great country and as a member of the Executive Branch he needs to enforce those laws, including the Defense of Marriage Act. It is the Supreme Court’s job to consider the constitutionality of the law and the President should not usurp the authority of the Supreme Court.

However, the Presidential oath does not say anything about upholding the law. As specified in Article II Section 1 of the Constitution, the oath is
I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.

That is exactly what President Obama and his administration are doing--defending the Constitution. Corwin is also wrong that he is usurping the authority of the Supreme Court. The Constitution does not give the Supreme Court the job of considering the constitutionality of laws. It is the job of all three branches of government. (In fact, the question of whether the courts had this power at all was not decided until the landmark case of Marbury vs. Madison in 1803.)

Ms. Corwin, I suggest you brush up on your constitutional law before making any more statements about the jobs of the various branches.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Somali thugs execute the American hostages

I said before that this situation was bad.

4 American hostages killed by pirates off Somalia
I hope the surviving thugs are brought to the U.S. and tried for murder. These criminal gangs should know that taking Americans, and some other countries' citizens, will only bring them death or long prison terms far, far from their homeland. If they kill the hostages at sea, they will certainly never see Somalia again.

UPDATE: 14 indicted in pirate attack on American yacht

UPDATE 5/20/11: Somali pleads guilty to piracy, hostage taking

UPDATE 5/23/11: Pirates killed U.S. couples after warning: court papers

UPDATE 5/24/11: Two more Somali pirates plead guilty in U.S. court

Four weeks of TFLNs, part 3: The rest

(919): So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.

(309): They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend

(907): I think a used vibrator from is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.

(269): Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.

(514): We had to coat check the pizza.

(630): im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.

(518): plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.

(662): The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl

(319): My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.

(804): I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...

(907): She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.

(905): I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings

(443): The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.

(630): He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.

(732): Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Four weeks of TFLNs, part 2: Sex (or not)

(978): I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.

(409): Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.

(310): I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.

(808): she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous

(215): the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.

(850): You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.

(816): My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.

(707): then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"

(410): Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.

(913): she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.

(513): I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.

(831): So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.

(630): don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.

(412): Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days

Four weeks of TFLNs, part 1: Last night

(702): You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy

(404): You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.

(573): I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."

(555): After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.

(701): Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?

(305): woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...

(858): Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.

(641): My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.

(541): Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.

(352): ... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.

(484): I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.

(319): Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.

(647): Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?

(850): why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?

(304): will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?

(+44): Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?

(204): Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?

(828): Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis

(513): Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?

(785): sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time

(757): The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

There was nothing like this in my trial advocacy course in law school

Judge: So I'll adjourn this trial to April 12, 2012.

Lawyer: They say the world may end in 2012.

Judge: Then I recommend you settle the case.

--Civil Court, Sutphin Boulevard, Jamaica

From Overheard in New York

Living with wild turkeys IX

Staten Island Residents Getting ‘Turkey Survey’

Somali thug gets his due

I missed this one a few days ago.

Manhattan Judge Sentences Somali Pirate To More Than 33 Years