Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Micro movie review

War Horse--over-simplified, dumbed-down, sentimentality. The play is much better.

Monday, December 26, 2011

TFLN time

(316): There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
(603): Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
(715): tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
(218): No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair.  It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
(310): I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
(610): You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours

Sunday, December 25, 2011