Monday, January 02, 2012

TFLNs, New Year's edition

(819): The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
(724): I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
(615): Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
(812): He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
(570): That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
(443): My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
(570): They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
(530): It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
(678): I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
(760): I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
(410): My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
(913): The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
(816): Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
(307): puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.

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