Tuesday I went to Therapy for the "first annual" (ahh, optimism) Stonewall Democrats of New York Women's Event, "A Celebration of Women in Politics."
I'm always a little leary about going to "women's events," as some are transphobic. But there was no question here--the invitation I received explicitly said transwomen were welcome. Then Stonewall Dems president Dirk McCall said men could come too, when he announced it at the 20th anniversary celebration. (The first women's event after 20 years? What took them so long?)
So after the question of whether I would be welcome was settled, my next question was, what to wear? This being a political event, I decided to keep it pretty conservative--a royal blue silk blouse paired with my black-on-black paisley slacks. I ended up getting compliments on both.
My final question was, what kind of turnout the event would get? I don't know that much about the club, really. I've been to only a handful of their events in the last four or five years. I actually joined just this last year. One thing I did notice is that there were relatively few women attending the events. (I get the feeling that LGBT groups are no different than any other mixed-gender organizations--men tend to predominate.) It turned out to be pretty well-attended. There were a fair number of men there. There were three of us transwomen also--joining me were Clover Honey (who is on the Stonewall Dems Board of Governors), and Melissa Sklarz, who arrived late after attending something at Gracie Mansion. Notably absent was Diana Montford, who is on their Board of Directors. Clover was happily telling everyone that the television show she appears on, Under the Pink Carpet, might be shown here in New York on one of the public TV channels.
I had a nice conversation with Eliyanna Kaiser, aide to Assembly Member Dick Gottfried, prime sponsor of the Gender Non-Discrimination Act (GENDA). Then I talked with Carol Polcovar, artistic director of the Fresh Fruit Festival. She's all excited about the upcoming world premiere of her new play My Mother Told Me I Was Different: Voices from the Rebellion, a docudrama about Stonewall in the words of the people who of lived it.
Finally, I chatted with Tom Hickey, the former chair of the LGBT Issues Committee of the New York County Lawyers Assn., before Clover and I went upstairs to claim seats for the presentations.
First up was comedian Michele Balin. I had seen her on a segment with Clover from Under the Pink Carpet. She was quite funny. Then came the award presentations, and this being a political event, the inevitable speeches. City Council Speaker Christine Quinn could not be present to accept hers, as it's "budget time." Councilmember Rosie Mendez was present though. Finally one went to Lisa Canistracci, owner of the lesbian bar Henrietta Hudson. One thing seemed to puzzle a number of the presenters and awardees. The award, a 10" lucite obelisk, was rather phallic-shaped. A couple of them made remarks about it--I think one even used the term "strap-on." I'm wondering if this was due to the fact that most of the work organizing the event was actually done by a man--Patrick Yacco, from the law office of Yetta Kurland, the Host Committee Chair and Stonewall Dems Corresponding Secretary.
After the ceremony Clover and I said our good-byes to people, and then made our way around the block to Vlada. We got drinks and waited for the show. Soon a rather lame host/comedian got up and introduced a very lame gay Indian (like from India) "comedian." I use quotes, because he really wasn't very funny. Even worse, he had to refer to a loose leaf notebook to remember his "jokes." Next up was Allison Castillo. Actually, she was pretty good--though still not quite in the class of Michelle Balin. Finally the host returned for his lame act.
By then we were quite hungry, so we went back to Ninth Avenue and had a decent dinner at a Thai place.
6 hours ago
3 comments:
That's exactly the kind of social situation I would be way too anxiety-stricken to attend, but would love to be a kind of fly-on-the-wall observer.
(I guess reading your post brings me as close as I'll be getting to that, so thanks!)
I'm really surprised. I'd never have guessed that from your writing. You seem so, um, secure in things.
I mean I'm shy, but I still manage to go. It does help, though, that I'm presenting as a more or less different person than my usual self. I'm definitely less shy when I present as a woman, than when I present as a man.
Maybe you'd do better if you wore a moustache.;)
Now that's an image, and, to be sure, an untried approach.
Maybe 15 years ago, I'd have done it on a dare. But then, 15 years ago, there were more daring things than that which I'd do in the (perceived) interests of justice... and it nearly got me killed.
Maybe all the daring-ness got kicked out of me... or else, maybe, it has survived (albeit in fragmented form), and the only thing I can do with it is write.
And if that's the case, I should be doing much more serious writing than I've been doing... before these stories burn holes in me and there's nothing left (either for the wearing of improbable mustaches, or for the writing of books).
Thank you, in any case, for the window into your own brave world; it's always a pleasure -- a privilege, really -- to peer through it here. :)
- V.
P.S. You can't imagine how much it cracks me up to fill in the "Choose an identity" spaces at the bottom of each post comment form. Really, that's pretty damned rich.
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