Time for more Texts From Last Night

(214): If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.

 http://tfl.nu/19fo

(206): She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.

 http://tfl.nu/x87e

(402): On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
(402): Update, its a couple

http://tfl.nu/mrbp

(403): so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.

 http://tfl.nu/j4fw

(607): Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.

 http://tfl.nu/om4f

(614): Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is

 http://tfl.nu/l5nn

(402): All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was

 http://tfl.nu/p0yn

(512): why does the wii remote smell like your vag?

 http://tfl.nu/z7m2